Something is burning, something is building, and it’s all very uncomfortable
Growing pains?
I live in Washington, DC and the vibes are bad. Every other person has been fired from their public service position with no regard for the negative impact this culling will have on public health, safety, and economic equality.
Something (our government) is clearly burning. But at the same time, it seems that something new is just beginning. I listened to a lecture by Otto Scharmer the other day on this very topic. The lecture was hosted by Grounded Idealist, a brand new group created by furloughed public servants working to connect coaches with impacted former federal employees. Something new emerging from the ashes.
I feel the uncertainty of what is falling away and the pull towards what wants to rise in its place in my own life. My government consulting job is hanging on by a thread. Yet, I feel little drive to hustle to replace it with something similar, should that even be an option. I feel lots of drive to be of service, to build my own business, to be a part of the growing movement I’m seeing to take care of our communities. An old way of living suddenly feels like a non-starter. A new way of living is starting to materialize, but it’s blurry, shaky, and also how do you afford it??
The result of all this? I feel uncomfortable. I’m anxious, restless, and unsure.
This has been showing up in a major way in my eating habits of late. I’d like to blame my recent overeating on the fact that my partner got swindled by his Girl Scout cookie selling niece. But, when I take a step back and apply my mind-body eating tools, it’s clear that I’m eating because I’m uncomfortable. And because I’ve been down this road 1 million times, I know that the eating doesn’t fix the discomfort. In fact, I don’t think there is a fix for this discomfort right now. I think I have to stay here until I know what to do next. Ugh.
So, that is the work for today, and probably tomorrow, and I don’t know how much longer: staying with discomfort. Reminding myself again and again that no amount of Thin Mints can sweeten the grief that is all around, and trusting that the discomfort I feel is here for a reason. We don’t change when we are comfortable. Why would we? This discomfort is here to move me (us?) in some way and towards something. My job is not to drown out the feeling with food, but to tune in to the direction it is trying to give. Who’s with me?
Looking for support as you navigate your own emotional eating journey? I’m here to help! Check out my offerings at annagordoncoaching.com ❤️
“We don’t change when we are comfortable. Why would we? This discomfort is here to move me (us?) in some way and towards something.”
Love this mental reframe. I think we can all benefit from this change in our thinking!